March 2012
111 posts
all rise for america's first tumblr president.
-benedict cumberbatch immediately declared naturalized american citizen, appointed Chancellor of Feelings
-immediately announces Operation Moonbeam, a 3 trillion dollar war on gender
-uses air force one to personally befriend and support “all the gays, everywhere”
-national religion is homestuck. poet laureate is homestuck. homestuck is now all members of supreme court.
-official...
February 2012
120 posts
that was mostly to give my new followers a "sneak...
Q: what’s the coolest way to explain to a vet that your dog Betsy is having trouble digesting her food
A: “the bitch’s shit ain’t nothing but kibbles and bits”
tahnk you. i hope you enjoyed funy joke. “smell” you later.
what if lord of the rings is just an extended metaphor about how much it sucks to get married. hmm, putting on a ring makes everyone ignore you while you are harried and pursued by dark forces hmm yeah okay dude. wearing it for too long makes you a troglodyte half-man with weird hobbies.
yeah these are the kind of things i think about okay. you laugh b/c i’m different, i laugh because i...
2 tags
im a human-passing anime. gokuqueer. uguusexual....
“human-passing privileged”
– WHAT IN THE LIVING SHIT DOES THIS EVEN MEAN EVERy SINGLE PERSON IN THE WORLD HAS ‘HUMAN-PASSING PRIVILEGE’ I AM GOING TO PEE ON YOU (via weeaboo-chan)
weeaboo-chan asked: THAT POST JUST BROKE MY TUMBLR SAVIOR OH MY GOD
1 tag
all about me and my politics: this is always an incomplete, unfinished, changing document. also, this post contains potentially triggering and explicit information and details. name(s): not telling you here system(s): mostly singlet, somewhat complicated species and/or spirit(s): human-passing privileged for all of the following: otherkin, therian, nonhuman, non/human, furry, cat, catkin, ...
arguing online is like competing in the special...
1 tag
weeaboo-chan:
OK I DON’T GIVE A SHIT IF I LOSE FOLLWOERS
‘FICTIVE’ IS NOT A VALID IDENTITY
YOU ARE NOT KARKAT
STOP
im really proud of you son
sci-fi original series: Atheifist and his young...
28 m. brontosaurus. you kno what they say about...
alessonforall:
Hate to break it to you man, Brontosauruses aren’t real.
why the fuck would you say that to me, a brontosaurus
kroganasaurus wrex
every time i make a joke about video games i put out a cigarette on my arm
1 tag
19, m4m, tyranasaurus rex looking for down n dirty...
ALTERNATE PUNCHLINE: tightanusaurus flex
1 tag
28 m. brontosaurus. you kno what they say about...
1 tag
43 M, FIT + SUCCESSFUL ALLOSAURUS HERE, WANT TO...
1 tag
18 m, pterodactyl-bodied, identify as t rex....
2 tags
22 f, velociraptor, tri-curious, looking 4 big...
i nicknamed my penis “schlong iver” because i’m still amazed it collaborated with kanye west that one time
i guess you could say i'm something of a...
all the ladies in the bar leave as one. i turn and mug to the bartender. he ignores me. the ladies come back and give me a trophy. it says “best pickup-doer.” im the best, and i have the most points
im imagining a brony sincerely describing his...
celiac soundgarden cover band: "black hole sun,...
i know i make fun of a lot of people but when i die my only thought will be “but did i make fun of men’s rights activists enough?”
moe anime, moe problems
MY OTHERKIN IDENTITY IS NASCARKAT
VROOM VROOM AS A PROUD ALTERIAN RACECAR IT’S REALLY UPSETTING THAT YOU EXPECT ME NOT TO RUN EVERYWHERE AS FAST AS I CAN AND YELL EVERYTHING I SAY
new dnd monsters: doghound. birdfriend. dire news....
if you must remember tumblr, remember a Gay Cgi...
rubarbed pii and icy crems :) a steakers! papsi....
jollityfarm:
perilz:
lordsteve:
help i can’t stop misspelling foods + drinks and saying them out loud and smiling
Toast, your husbando
take me now, lord steve
I’m ready
I’ll make vegum plammut babber and jammy sandwatches.
*peels u a nanner w/ honnay* let’s go meet some babes
boomette:
You can prevent tragedies simply by checking and maintaining your privilege and practicing a privilege escape plan. All privilege in your house should be checked once a month. Every family should develop a privilege escape plan and practice it at least twice a year.
Every year in the United States, about 3,000 people lose their privilege in residential fires. Most privilege...
attn: a Teen is now president
-constitution now just a bunch of fight club quotes
-instead of traditional “god bless america” ends every speech w/ “what the deuce, america”
-national anthem now everything but country
-all voting booths now just ask you “red pill… or blue pill?”
-amy pohler now literally in charge of every irl parks and recs department. she’s a comedian....
rubarbed pii and icy crems :) a steakers! papsi....
help i can’t stop misspelling foods + drinks and saying them out loud and smiling
4 tags
teen: what’s for dinner?
mother: corm and haam and smashed topatoes with melk to drink :)
teen: *flips table* WHY CANT WE JUST SPELL THINGS LIKE A NORMAL FAMILY
i go to comiccon dressed as one of the millions of...
*raises fist in solidarity, fist is immediately cut off by lightsaber*
2 tags
secret: we liberals are pro-abortion b/c we are...
like one time i was talking to my friend about how i bought a new toyota and this baby WHO I THOUGHT WAS ASLEEP IN HIS STROLLER suddenly snapped his eyes open and said “bet u wish you got a new boytoyota instead, faggot” and i heard high-pitched giggling all around me and realized that cranky babies were crawling out of sewer grates and leaning out of open windows up above. “oh...
5 tags
"ne cede phallus"
-new feminist creed? u can thank me later ladies
what if instead of being horrible to each other we were nice to each other instead. makes u think
http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Breasts
kingbeetle:
sherlock-hound:
Why sci-fi geeks have the stereotype of being weird perverts, example 1
a portrait of an autist as a young man
http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Breasts
zeiss-manifold:
lordsteve:
zeiss-manifold:
in related news http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Jizz is still there
“This article is about the musical genre. You may be looking for the instrument.”
haha heck yeah i am bring it on
at least you’re not looking for pornography
i-it’s not true
that’s impossible
jizz is my passion, and jizz is my instrument....
http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Breasts
zeiss-manifold:
in related news http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Jizz is still there
“This article is about the musical genre. You may be looking for the instrument.”
haha heck yeah i am bring it on
2 tags
http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Breasts
*accidentally shows x-rated porn self-pics to...
zeiss-manifold:
god bless lordsteve and all the ships at sea
god save brittannia :)
supey:
owlpellets:
runawayballista:
lordsteve:
toastradamus:
lordsteve:
incitatus-ebooks:
beesmygod:
evitron:
lordsteve:
redwall character 1: don’t badger me, you can’t weasel your way out of this one
redwall character 2: why i otter…
redwall character 3: hey guys it’s time for a feast
*every mouse, hedgehog, snake, badger and rat from every book comes in for a HUGE...
1 tag
*accidentally shows x-rated porn self-pics to...
*all the africans, orcs and rats come into the gas...
fwiw the *every mouse, hedgehog, snake, badger and...
toastradamus:
lordsteve:
incitatus-ebooks:
beesmygod:
evitron:
lordsteve:
redwall character 1: don’t badger me, you can’t weasel your way out of this one
redwall character 2: why i otter…
redwall character 3: hey guys it’s time for a feast
*every mouse, hedgehog, snake, badger and rat from every book comes in for a HUGE feast!*
redwall character 4: kill the lesser races. people...
somewhere on deviantart there is an elaborately colored painting of tintin and martin the champion of redwall and aragorn three-way high-fiving over a huge pile of dead africans, rats, and orcs.
“anyone else noticed how some races are just born inferior and evil and there’s nothing they can do about it it’s just like in their blood man” -a bunch of beloved authors
incitatus-ebooks:
beesmygod:
evitron:
lordsteve:
redwall character 1: don’t badger me, you can’t weasel your way out of this one
redwall character 2: why i otter…
redwall character 3: hey guys it’s time for a feast
*every mouse, hedgehog, snake, badger and rat from every book comes in for a HUGE feast!*
redwall character 4: kill the lesser races. people who look different from us...
turns out injecting shit and piss into your face...
yahooanswers really let me down on this one. smh